Everyone knows I hate stupid sayings and all the cliche quotes people throw out when they don’t know what to say, and yet, somehow I think I just may see the tiniest, littliest bit of silver lining on these storm clouds.
After spending all night awake, crying and laughing and talking and baking chocolate chip cookies at 2am because damn it I wanted cookies and I hadn’t eaten a real meal since…oh hell, weeks, I feel the smallest little bit of relief. Just a little bit of “we will BOTH survive”. That it will be long and hard, but that we don’t have to follow anyone’s rules for how we “should” act or what we “should” be doing. That we will do what we think is best as it comes to us. That love is a powerful thing and even when it doesn’t work out the way you want it to, it doesn’t have to be a knock-down, drag-out fight. That eventually, after a lot of time and work and energy and a little bit of therapy thrown in, we will both be okay – in both the lives we will lead separately and in the part of our lives that will be intertwined forever. That having been lucky enough to experience a love as great as this, I am much luckier than many others. That I will love you always and that’s okay.
Tattooed Wonder Said:
on October 19, 2007 at 11:48 pm
Love is great at times, love sucks at times. Love it going to make you smile, love is going to punch you in the face. Love is going to surprise you, love is going to fuck you over. But love in the end….. is an experience. Sometimes good, sometimes bad. But it’s out there. Maybe not with the one you think right away. Sometimes not even the one some people end up with. But it’s out there for you, it’s out there for me. One day we will find it.
And if not…..well, we will be old ladies together with lots of pets and a cabana boy!!!
Kirk Said:
on October 22, 2007 at 11:52 am
Uh… is there an application for that ‘cabana boy’ position?
Seriously, though, at 54 I have a great deal of insight on love and other such levels of emotional attachment. I won’t burden you with that, but to say that the one cliche that has always proved true in my life is that Things will ALWAYS get better with time. Always. Even though the hurt and anguish never goes away, it becomes more like and emotional wall decoration that with time is just not noticed all that often, and then just disappears in the clutter of all the other emotional wall decorations we acquire.
Hang in there, sweetie. I have to agree with your sister…